Wednesday, April 30, 2003

"What makes the monkey dance?"

I think it's a valuable question that deserves our thought and attention.

-fleas could do the trick. The dance could just be an ellaborate stratching session misunderstood.

- It could be bananas. Food is a very powerful motivator. I've done more than dance for something less than a banana. But, I'm not a monkey...let alone THE maybe not... Monkeys might be smarter than that.

- Maybe money makes the monkey dance... Money is quite the source of power. You can buy almost anything with money (not love though, of course). But the monkey would probably just eat the money - because he doesn't understand the concept of paper currency. "It's a bit like the mule with a spinning wheel. Darned if we know where he got it and darned if he knows how to use it."..or something like that. (See "The Simpsons" Monorail episode)

- Maybe female monkeys make him dance. This is the most likely scenario I think. If I were a monkey and I saw a hot girl monkey, I think that I would start doing my little monkey dance to show her what a great monkey "catch" I was.

Well, a lot of evidence has been presented here. I don't claim to know all the answers and maybe we have only just scratched the surface of this important question. But I hope this has helped you come to your own conclusions on "what makes the monkey dance?" In conclusion, I'd just like to emphasize that like most philosophical discussions the only answer that matters in the end---is your own.

Sunday, April 27, 2003

well, it was a good weekend...and when all is said and done, I must admit I learned a lot...

First of all...
I learned that my grandfather thinks I'm still Patrick's age (or younger) and can't finish my plate. At Market Street Grill he was very impressed that I not only finished my own meal but also some of my grandmother's... (yum...halibut and baja fish tacos....)

I learned that "Porn" means beautiful in Thai. (I wonder how they distinguish between "beauty" and pictures of naked people in erotic poses...maybe thy think nudes in erotic poses are beautiful...hmmmmmmmm)

I learned that my friends don't listen...

You can tell everyone you know that you are going to walk in commencement and convocation ceremonies and that your family is flying in for the weekend and you'll probably be spending most of the weekend with them and then when you show up for church on Sunday they'll still all ask you -almost in unision- "Where were you?"

So, to cap off all of the book learning this semester was some nice lessons from the school of hard knocks...

When can I graduate from that school? Soon I hope.

Monday, April 21, 2003

Oh...I just remembered more fun details of the day to share...

Book buybacks stink. I couldn't sell back my Mythology book marked by thick Feminist rhetoric because a new edition is coming out...Sheesh. I was offered 3 dollars for a book but even the teller knew I wouldn't fall for that trick and set the book aside.

I went in expecting a return of over 35 dollars and came out with $8.

As I ate my cheeseburger and frenchfries...I couldn't help think that an hour ago it was a dry book about symbolism in fairytales.

MaX your heart out.
So, I didn't go to sleep last night. That's right. I stayed up all night. What's that? because of finals, you ask? No.
Well, I mean, I did have a final- a take-home final at that- but I finished writing it about 4:45am, leaving me plenty of time to sleep before its 10am deadline. But did I sleep? NO.

It's great feeling almost being done with finals...(and with school for that matter).
But things turn all funny and strange when you haven't slept. I've started hallucinating, even hearing things.
Today in my delusions of grandeur, I thought I heard someone say that they heard a professor say that I was "articulate." That is absurd.
The only reason I could make of this was that I must have dreamt it as I lay on the carpet in the post-production sound room trying to take a nap.

Well, so, um, I haven't got much for you, but if my hallucinations continue to be this complimentary I may never go to sleep again.
And I suppose that if nothing else, in the words of my dear friends, you could always tell this story to kids who are thinking about using drugs.


Friday, April 18, 2003

I need a change of pace (turtle speed isn't going to get me there soon enough)
a change of scenery (I don't want to watch strangers enjoying the pool anymore-I don't want to hear them EITHER!)
a change in diet (no more frozen pizzas....PLEASE!)
a change in habit (why are all of my favorite television shows on after midnight?)


Monday, April 14, 2003

What's the deal with old people and buffets?
KFC-all you can eat buffet, Home Buffet, and Chuck-O-Rama. Our elderly love these places...And I'd really like to know why!

The food at these places isn't spectacular; just meat and potatoes really. It's all stuff you can make for yourself at home.
Are our elderly friends just excited to see so much food that they didn't have to prepare themselves? After a lifetime of making food for yourself and your family, seeing mountains of green jello and pot roast would be heaven. I guess the great satisfaction lies in eating familiar food but not having to cook it or clean up after it.
But is that why they are really there?

Maybe sitting down amongst strangers stuffing their faces with said meat and potatoes, our elders see the memories of fifty Thanksgivings gone by. In the green Jell-O they see reflected their youngest daughter's second marriage wedding reception. Eating the potato salad reminds them of easier times, times when little boys could frolic in a field shooting wild cats with BB guns...In the eyes of the workers who are clapping out the birthday while totting soft-serve ice cream from a machine that is self-service they see a vigor and a hope of a youthful generation that has passed them by. Then they sit there and eat and think...and it's like a Norman Rockwell painting really, or something.

Maybe this is why they love these buffets so...
But perhaps we'll never know...

(er, at least for another 45 years or so...)

Thursday, April 10, 2003

Last night on MTV's Dismissed the unthinkable-nay-the unbelievable happened.

Good morals were presented, reinforced and ultimately endorsed...
Now, I just happened upon this television show as I was skipping through the channels because-uh- I NEVER watch MTV, or VH1 or any of that soft-core garbage...(heh-heh). But, if you're not familiar with the premise of the show, they send two boys on a date with one girl and both boys fight over the girl and then she chooses who she'd like to date (the first half of the show is a boy choosing between two girls). Anyway, one of the boys was trying to play up his supposed "Cassanova" bad-boy image. He was exagerrating his sexual exploits and trying to appear wild for the girl.
However, the other boy stood up for his values on cable television. He spoke out against smoking and drinking but not in a preacherly way. He wasn't interested in pre-marital sex. And he was honest, upfront, and sincere with the girl. She asked him if it would bother him to date someone who wasn't a virgin and his answer impressed me greatly...he said, "I don't think that it's so much where you have been...but the direction in which you're currently heading."
The girl, who's morals up until meeting this young man may have been greatly influenced by the lifestyle that MTV seems to promote, was impressed and ended up choosing the kid who stood up for good."
I hoped that the thousands of teenagers watching took note and were influenced for good. I
It was a poignant reminder to me to stand up for my beliefs whatever situation I'm in and to not fear the voice of man.

Perhaps MTV isn't as bad as I thought...

Or, perhaps not.

Saturday, April 05, 2003

What makes me enjoy a film like "The Last Dragon"?

Probably its direct lack of any cinematic value....

And its kickin' score.

"Who's the master?"

The answer is in that fortune cookie, man.

Wednesday, April 02, 2003

Last night as i walked home from class I couldn't help notice the beauty of Spring.
The cherry blossoms were in full bloom, and the night's cool breeze gently stirred their scent, reminding me of Japan.
I could almost see red lanterns dangling inbetween the flowering branches, casting a red glow on the path home.

The only thing that was missing was a billion drunk business men enjoying beer underneath the pink canopy.

Ahhhh Spring!